Sesame Street Introduces ‘Todd’, A White Male Muppet Who Is Blamed For Everything

A Babylon Bee exclusive report:

Sort of reminds me of some Fortune 500 Woke companies I’ve frequented in my career.

But, I digress.

QUEENS, NY—In a courageous new episode of Sesame Street, the puppets teach kids about social justice by introducing a new character, Todd– a white male puppet who is blamed for everything wrong in the world.

Minutes into the episode, Todd is introducing himself to the other puppets and a prescriptively diverse cast of guest children, when he is confronted by Grover about Todd’s culpability regarding a distant ancestor who fought for the Confederacy.

Later on, Todd works alongside the puppet Abby Cadabby to stock the shelves of Hooper’s store with Goya beans. His accidental revelation that he gets paid 30% more than her leads to Abby singing a tearful rendition of ‘Workforce Woes.’

The episode’s final sketch portrays Todd selling cookies without the requisite health warning labels, forcing Cookie Monster into obesity and skyrocketing healthcare costs.

In an upcoming 17-part series entitled “R is for Racism”, Todd appears in multiple educational scenarios including a math teacher forcing minority puppets to learn 2 + 2 = 4, an ignorant puppet who thinks some cops might be good, and in a particularly jarring sketch, a shady character teaching kids to face life’s unfairness with hard work, self-sacrifice, and hope for the future.

I had one of those racist math teachers. More than a few math teachers who considered mathematics the only thing worth knowing. They were nuns who took a vow of poverty and no grief from punk Brooklyn kids. I still recall Sister Delores in class smacking around more than a few 13 year old boys who had trouble with respecting authority.

The Civil War was long done when my immigrant grandparents got here with no money and no handouts available to them. They told me they wouldn’t accept a dime anyway.

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